036: Find Better Balance – 10 Alignments with Happy Hustler Cary Jack

[00:00:22] Cary Jack:Well, it came from a scratch in my own itch because as an entrepreneur, I fell victim to the ever-growing entrepreneurial burnout and you know, I’ve always been an entrepreneur I’ve had. Construction businesses. I’ve had soccer camp businesses. I’ve had businesses that were illegal, and everything in between.

[00:00:43] Um, I’m not proud of some of my past. I’ll be honest with you. I used to do things the wrong way and not operate with integrity and, Made a massive pivot when I saw the law from the other side and got arrested and, you know, it was a, it was a big shift but I’ve since, used business as a force for good and operate in pure integrity now and transformed my life.

[00:01:05] And it really took shape when I was in New York city hustling, but not happy. I was with my brother, my business partner, my best friend, and we were growing this tech startup. We were wearing fancy suits and had investor meetings and went into massive meetups. We solicited this seven figure VC funding deal from private capital.

[00:01:28] And then we had. Two deals on the table, one with Microsoft and one with IBM to, uh, join their BizSpark and global entrepreneurship programs, which came with funding and cloud storage and a bunch of other benefits. And we got to the point where we were working a hundred plus hours, weeks, we were getting less than five hours of sleep.

[00:01:50] And we went astray from our initial purpose behind the company. And We got to the point where we had to decide, do we take this money? And with the money came a five-year commitment clause, meaning, you’re beholden to the business. If someone’s going to give you that much money, rightfully so they want you to, they want you to be in it to win it.

[00:02:14] So we. Basically had this tear jerking conversation in our shithole apartment in Queens, New York, my brother and I were sharing a king size bed at the time. And, um, we just decided we couldn’t take the money, you know, w we, we decided, you know, This is unfulfilling it’s, uh, it’s just not the path we want.

[00:02:35] You know, we were chasing profit and success and status and titles, and ultimately we made this massive pivot. We said no to the funding deal. Folded the company and, you know, with it, 18 months hard work. And, uh, I moved to Bangkok Thailand for 10 months and my brother went to the university of Florida to get his master’s and it was in Bangkok that I actually.

[00:02:59] Started to figure out a better way to work and live, you know, a way to, uh, be happy within the hustle, you know, and I made my first dollar online over there as well. And I was like, wow, there’s more to it. Like I got a $400 a month penthouse. I’m living like a king, you know, and I’m traveling all over Southeast Asia and I’m having the time of my life.

[00:03:22] And that’s where the happy hustle was 

[00:03:23] Zach White: born. Wow. Okay. So let me back up though, before we get to the Bangkok in this next chapter, I want to go back to New York. This, you mentioned that the, the purpose kind of strayed during those 18 months, what do you mean by that? What, what was the original purpose of the company?

[00:03:39] How did that come off track? 

[00:03:42] Cary Jack: Yeah, so the original purpose was quantifying feedback. We built an algorithm. That quantified feedback. And in order to grow in any industry, you need to know, you know, where you’re deficient. And so we initially built it to. Scratch the entertainment industries itch. You know, when you’re going on auditions, I’ve been an actor and model, you know, for 15 plus years, you know, just part-time.

[00:04:06] And, you know, I was always reluctant to leave an audition and not know where I went wrong. So I just started, you know, getting feedback from these casting directors in these clients. And I started booking a lot more gigs. I started, you know, really taken off and, um, You know, I’ve worked with Dwayne, the rock Johnson and Michael bay and home Depot and Corona and Michelob, ultra all these commercials.

[00:04:30] And I was like doing the damn thing and people just kept asking me, how are you booking so much Carey? And I just said, well, here’s why like I’m getting feedback. And then we put it on an app. We built this beta app. And then people said, well, can you actually use this algorithm to quantify feedback in the job market?

[00:04:48] You know, when people leave a job interview, Yeah, I guess you could. And then we’re like, oh, uh, could you use it for the dating industry? Oh yeah. I guess you could, you could quantify your, your, your first date and get feedback, you know, and it’s like, it was just this like morph, but it kind of went astray from where we initially thought we were going to take it.

[00:05:06] And then, you know, when you’re starting to bring in outside capital, you’re almost, beholden to their vision as well. You know? And so that’s kind of where we went 

[00:05:15] Zach White: over. And so coming back to that tear jerking conversation, what was it that actually brought clarity for you and your brother that this isn’t it like, we don’t want to sign up for five more years of this.

[00:05:29] W what was the thing that crystallized that for you? 

[00:05:32] Cary Jack: I was just so unhappy. I was so out of balance, you know, I was only focused on just work and I was only focused on. Getting the deal, you know, moving the needle, hiring top tier talent, you know, just grow in the company, success, you know, status. And it’s like, I think our culture glorifies, this grind mentality where it’s like people brag about working on weekends, you know, it’s like, And I just didn’t want that.

[00:06:02] I just didn’t want that life. I, I knew deep down in my soul that I was destined for more. And, you know, I’m much more passionate about solving like global ecological issues and massive mindset issues within the human psyche and raising the collective consciousness. You know, that was speaking far greater to my soul than.

[00:06:27] Tech startup, which still has merit today, which still would crush. You know what I mean? But it’s just like, you have to decide in life. What’s really important. 

[00:06:37] Zach White: I wasn’t happy. Couldn’t picture yourself doing that for five more years, regardless of how much money was available. You go off to Bangkok to discover yourself, to, to create some transformation.

[00:06:51] Tell us, I mean, I’m sure there’s a whole hour worth of stories from Bangkok, but condense it down. Like, what was it that actually created those aha moments or awareness for you while you were in Bangkok? 

[00:07:02] Cary Jack: Yeah, Yeah, it was just the freedom, you know, we all crave three types of. Creative freedom, time, freedom and financial freedom.

[00:07:12] And over there I had all three. And when I realized that there was just a better way for me to live and work and be happy within the hustle, I just started putting. You know, framework together. And that’s where, you know, the 10 alignments of being a happy hustler that, you know, the soul mapping app acronym started to take form, and then it evolved over time.

[00:07:38] And then, you know, more and more people were asking me about how I created this, you know, this lifestyle, entrepreneurship, you know, business and, and how I can. Kind of have it all and do, do these different things. And by no means, am I perfect? I have so much room to grow and I I’m a constant student of life, but I did crack the code on this work-life balance thing in some capacity.

[00:08:02] And so that’s now my message is to how to actually find that blissful balance. 

[00:08:09] Zach White: These three freedoms. You mentioned, this is a really powerful concept that everybody desires, creative, freedom, time, freedom, and financial freedom. I’m curious, Carrie, you’ve worked with a lot of leaders in all different sectors and industries and type of work, which of those three is the hardest one for people to actually create.

[00:08:31] Cary Jack: I would say time, freedom, financial freedom. People can create wealth. And you oftentimes in the processes of creating wealth, you lose your time, right. And creative freedom. That’s achievable along the journey of wealth creation. Right? You have more, when you have more capital, you have more creative capacity to.

[00:08:58] You know, follow your desires, but time freedom is the one equalizer for everyone. Time is constantly ticking away and I’ve been recently. Contemplating my own death more. And I know it’s a little grim, but, um, there’s this Latin phrase, memento, Mori, and it means, remember you are going to die. And in the country of Bhutan, they are reminded that they are going to dive five times every single day.

[00:09:27] So. I actually have an app on my phone called we croak that reminds me I’m going to die five times a day. And, uh, it also brings a positive quote to remember, to live with urgency and intentionality. And when you remember you’re going to die, not in. a pessimistic, evil despair in way, but just like, it’s a, it’s a fact of life you truly do start to live with more urgency with more intentionality, you say no to more things and yes, to the things that you are aligned with that are going to achieve the desired result.

[00:10:07] Zach White: It’s interesting. You say. If it goes all the way back to my very first episode with Zander fryer, his key moment in changing his life was deep awareness of his own mortality and encountering death. And so I really appreciate what you’re saying. It’s not, uh, you know, oh my goodness, nothing matters because one day I’m going to die a pessimistic view, but to say in a humble way, this moment matters because I don’t know when will be my last and really, really powerful.

[00:10:35] So I want to hit on. 10 alignments and the soul mapping, because there’s so much there that our engineering mind needs to hear, but really quick, we talk time, freedom. It’s tough. And I also consents for myself coming from the engineering world, we talk about lifestyle engineering versus lifestyle entrepreneurship, and, you know, there might be a temptation to think, yeah, this is.

[00:11:01] For the entrepreneur, for the person who’s building that online business and has the flexibility, or has the capital or whatever. I work in a nine to five or okay. Being real and maybe it’s eight to six or eight to eight, whatever that is for that person. So can you just address if there’s some tension in our mindset about the, yeah, this is great for Carrie and the entrepreneurs, but it’s not for me.

[00:11:22] What would you say. 

[00:11:24] Cary Jack: Yeah, well, first let me just mention Butan is the happiest country in the world. Uh, I, I left that part out, but according to the happiness, um, metric and this global scientific study, there’s science behind actually being reminded of your own mortality to your point. And in terms of, you know, creating blissful balance.

[00:11:45] And becoming a happy hustler or a happy engineer. Like this is not just for entrepreneurs. This is for nine to fivers CEOs, busy executives, engineers of all types. It doesn’t matter. These 10 alignments will be applicable. And the reason being is because we’re all human and these 10 areas of life are something we all encounter.

[00:12:13] So it’s. And they’re timeless. 

[00:12:17] Zach White: I love that situation, environment, occupation. It doesn’t matter. And I know Carrie, you work with CEOs and you work with executives and people who have the hardest jobs on the planet, so to speak. And so with that said, I know I’m excited to hear about like, what is the 10 alignments?

[00:12:31] How does this work? Put it together for us? You know, where do we begin? 

[00:12:35] Cary Jack: The 10 alignments make up an acronym. It’s essentially your soul’s map to the blissfully balanced promised land Seoul mapping. Okay. And I urge everyone listening right now to be an active participant, not just listen and let it go in one ear and out the other, you know, I love podcasts.

[00:12:58] I love podcasts like this and. I get the most out of podcasts when I actually am participating. So with that being said, Pull out, you know, your notebook or your cell phone or your note taking device. And I’m going to actually go through these 10 alignments. And I want you to actually rank yourself in each of these 10 areas.

[00:13:20] Now, the ranking rubric, I wasn’t much for school, but I do know the grading scale. So a five would be in a year, right? You’re crushing it. You’re happy, hustling and disalignment. A one would be an F you’re failing. Right. And you need to prioritize. Okay. So Zach, I, uh, if you’re feeling brave, I’d, uh, I’d like you to go through it as well, and then we can review and on the air.

[00:13:43] Oh, I 

[00:13:43] Zach White: think this is perfect. So, okay. And Carrie, you’re going to be really pleased that engineers are the best note takers on the planet. So I know, I know that my listeners are going to have an incredibly fun time going through this, so yeah, let’s do it. I’m all yours, man. What’s the first 

[00:13:58] Cary Jack: what’s the first S is selfless service, right?

[00:14:03] I want you to think about where you’ve rank in this alignment? Okay. Five is an, a one is an F ask yourself, are you strictly living for your own personal gain or are you giving back to others? You know, and Tony Robin says the secret to living is giving it’s one of my favorite quotes and I feel the most fulfilled when I’m giving to others.

[00:14:25] Right. So ask yourself right now, where do you actually rank in selfless service? One to five. Okay. And be honest with yourself. People O stands for optimized health, right? You can not happy hustle in any capacity. If you don’t have your. And physical and emotional health. Right. Where do you rank in this alignment?

[00:14:50] You know, are you crushing it? Are you optimized and you know, at your peak state or are you shoving your pie hole with, uh, you know, process garbage. Crap foods and yeah, just be real 

[00:15:03] Zach White: head on hunter. Oh yeah. The importance of that one. Yes. 

[00:15:06] Cary Jack: Food is diet medicine. U stands for unplugged digital. And this one, I find a lot of busy, you know, engineers and professionals and entrepreneurs struggle with this one because we’re so hyper-connected, you know, especially you and I run an online businesses.

[00:15:25] We use tech every day. Right? However, You have to mitigate your exposure to these toxic devices and their effects. You have to be in control. Right? So rank where you’re at in this alignment, one to five. And I’ll just tell you straight up. And the mist right now, as we record this of a seven day dopamine detox, no social media, no movies, no streaming shows, no YouTube.

[00:15:52] I only have an hour of podcast and our music a day just when I hit the gym and then podcasts for work just to listen and prep. And I’ll tell you, I’ve had the most productive days I’ve had in months been slaying. And it’s because I’m not distracted by all of. Life’s distractions. And these, these devices, so rank where you’re at and you 

[00:16:15] Zach White: carry on the unplugging really quick.

[00:16:17] One of the things that immediately pops in for me, and I imagine a lot of people would say, this is I have to be plugged in to my devices for my job. can only imagine your clients come in with these same kinds of mindsets or challenges. What do you say to someone if that’s this belief that we have. I can’t detox from this because I have to be plugged in.

[00:16:39] What, what do you think, man? 

[00:16:41] Cary Jack: Well, I think it’s bullshit. I think, uh, w I think we all can mitigate our exposure to these devices by working smarter than harder, you know, a task expands to the time allotted, and I’ve found that to be true in my own, you know? And my own business. And I’m not saying you have to completely disconnect from all your devices all the time, but I’m saying when you’re not using your device, put it on airplane mode when you’re not using your wifi unplugged the wifi.

[00:17:06] When you’re, you know, instead of getting up and looking at your phone, read a book, meditate, practice gratitude. Before going to bed, you know, read a book. You know, meditate, practice gratitude. Don’t watch a streaming show on Sundays. I do a 24 hour detox typically where I don’t touch my devices, getting out in nature, you know, there’s ways to use your tech and not have it used you.

[00:17:28] And so I think you can be in control your devices much more. And if everyone’s being real with themselves, I would 

[00:17:33] Zach White: say they would agree. Agree a hundred percent. I just love hearing it from more than just myself. I tell my clients. If a CEO leading a team of thousands is able to execute on these things, which we know they are, you work with them.

[00:17:46] I work with them, then you can do it. So can you keep going with the L well 

[00:17:51] Cary Jack: loving relationships? Right? So what’s it all for, if you don’t have love in your life. And, you know, I find a lot of. Hungry, you know, performance driven individuals, they push so hard in the professional life and then they let the personal life slip, you know, You just have to ask yourself, is there an angst and despair in your immediate relationships or is the plentiful pleasure? You know, and this is one, it’s a constant work in progress. Every relationship requires energy and effort and you have to give energy and. And attention, mind you to those relationships in order for them to thrive.

[00:18:30] So rank where you’re at in loving relationships, one to five. So we got the soul part down. Okay. And Zach, do you want to review your four? 

[00:18:38] Zach White: All right. Yeah. So my selfless service score is a four. I give myself a B in that category, the optimized. I feel great in that area. It’s something I take really seriously.

[00:18:50] Health and vitality is my number one core value. And so I gave myself a five they’re unplugged digitally. It’s two. I am I’m in that place where I’m pretty constantly plugged in with. Uh, I’ll say there’s some moments of exceptions, kind of like you’re doing with a detox I’ll fast for three days or something from food and digital plug it.

[00:19:10] But, but on a day-to-day basis, man, it’s, it’s not good. So it’s a two for me and then loving relationships, a three, you know, my, my amazing spouse Johana who carry you know, she’s been on your incredible podcasts, but we’re, we’re in a great place, but. What really struck me as you described it as the plentiful nature.

[00:19:28] Like, I don’t do a great job of extending that into that next level circle. And part of it is what you’re saying, that that time and hustle with clients and the business and these other things can make a tough, so it’s a three for me. 

[00:19:43] Cary Jack: Yeah. And here’s the thing, you know, everyone listening, I hope you give yourself grace, this is a baseline, you know, and it really is just important to you.

[00:19:52] Measure yourself in these different limes, because what you measure you can manage. So we got the soul part, then let’s get into the mapping part. Okay. And M stands for mindful spirituality. So. Are you connecting with a higher power, you know, are you praying and meditating and practicing gratitude and, you know, really tapping into source energy, whatever you believe in, you know, I don’t really care what you believe in.

[00:20:15] I just care that you believe, you know, and that you have faith in something bigger than yourself. You know? So rank one to five in this alignment, a how abundance financially, right? Everyone thinks this broad is probably the most important, but it’s not, you know, they each have equal importance. But you gotta make money.

[00:20:34] You know, if you want to be a happy hustler or a happy engineering, you gotta be making money. And you know, for me, it’s really important to have a system that saves invest in spends, you know, wisely for me for, you know, eternity like that works while I’m sleeping. if you’re living paycheck to paycheck and you know, really worried about your finances are in debt.

[00:20:57] It’s tough to be the best version of yourself. So abundance financially is, is an important alignment. So rank where you’re at in this one P the first P personal develop. Right. You’re either growing and evolving or you’re shrinking and dissolving, and those are the two options. So you decide, and, you know, I have a personal growth system for success where I’ll read 30 minutes every morning.

[00:21:24] I’ll listen to something educational inspirational in the afternoon, and then I’ll watch something visually stimulated in the evening. Now, since I’m on my dopamine detox, you know, I’m not watching, but I will say that keeps me going. Every single day, you know, and it’s little decisions like that, that will move the needle in your life.

[00:21:41] So Brank where you’re at in personal development, the second P passionate hobbies. And this one is by far one of my favorites. However, it’s one that I see the majority of people lacking in. Right. They’re not doing fun things. They’re not doing fun things that they enjoy, you know, they’re too busy, quote unquote.

[00:22:01] Right. Okay. This is one of those alignments that truly will skyrocket your happiness. When you start to fill your own cup, you can give from your overflow. And you know, for me, I live in Montana. I love the outdoors. I love fly fishing and horseback riding and, you know, practicing martial arts and playing soccer.

[00:22:21] I played soccer in college and I’ve thought that was my path to play pro. You know, I still get after it on Sundays with, with the guys and, you know, it’s just little things like that. I do dancing with my fiance, you know, w we’ll go do dance class. I know you’re a dancer too, you know? Yeah. I mean, there’s a lot of little things that I enjoyed doing.

[00:22:39] I painted these like splatter paintings behind me recently. I had a blast, you know, and it’s little things like that. That just keep you balanced. So ask yourself where you’re at in passionate. 

[00:22:50] Zach White: Huh? On this one, carry something that I’m curious for your perspective. I hear a lot from my engineering clients that I don’t invest a lot of time into these other hobbies because I love my work.

[00:23:03] I really do enjoy what I do for work. And so I put in these long hours, but I love it. That’s the story that they they’re telling themselves in there. There may be a lot of truth in that, but they’re lacking in this alignment. What’s been your experience of somebody. Kind of is living in that mode where it’s, you know, I don’t need passionate hobbies because I love my work.

[00:23:22] What’s your thought around that? 

[00:23:25] Cary Jack: Yeah. I, I would just disagree strongly. I think everyone needs passion and hobbies, and you really have to get back to that childlike wonder state where, you know, you think about what you really enjoyed as a kid and get back to some of that joy because you will do better work.

[00:23:41] When you actually have time away and can decompress and just be yourself and creative and have fun. And here’s the thing, oftentimes with passionate hobbies, you’ve got to pay for it, you know? So it’s like, I know there’s barriers with these passionate hobbies, but this is a key component of living a blissfully balanced life.

[00:24:05] So 

[00:24:06] Zach White: that’s well said, well said, and you and I have in common dancing and horses are two of the most expensive hobbies on the planet, but, but it is it’s so good. And the other thing I’ll add to this for the person who’s looking at, what’s my alignment score. I’ve found if you work in a domain that’s heavily centered around your mind, which engineers are, it’s great to have a part of your passionate hobbies, be with the body.

[00:24:32] And if you work in a space that’s heavily leveraging your body. If you do physical labor all day to have passionate hobbies that are in that opposite domain of the mind, something that for me has always been effective to get back into balance and finding, I love that childlike. Wonder what a great. Yeah.

[00:24:50] Cary Jack: Great, great point there. Great points. Now I stands for impactful work and this means you’re actually infusing your passion, which is, you know, that inward calling with your purpose, which is that outward serving mission to actually make a positive impact, right. To positively leave a legacy that is bigger than yourself.

[00:25:15] And. You know, I know the engineers out there, they most likely got into this profession because they feel. A sense of meaning behind it, you know, and it is meaningful work. However, maybe there’s a little more to it for you, and there’s a way that you can go deeper. And I always like to ask those brand builders questions that you and I both resonate with.

[00:25:36] It’s what problem do you actually feel called to solve? Who exactly do you feel called to solve it for? And then what’s your uniqueness and how can you explain that in the service of others? Right. So rank I impactful. Where you’re at and then N nature connection. So. Getting outside, tapping into this beautiful mother earth and just getting back to our primal bean.

[00:26:00] This is so imperative, especially now we spend 96% of our time indoors. And you know, this is one of those alignments. I just really get back to a grounded sense of peace and calm when I’m out in nature and the wilderness. And, you know, that’s why I actually do these, uh, Montana mastermind, epic camping adventures, where I take high-level entrepreneurs into the back country wilderness for five days, we camp.

[00:26:27] No tech, no devices. We’re 10 miles deep in the wilderness. We hike in, you know, I bring in a primitive survival expert, a fly fishing expert, a professional back country, chef, you know, and, and we have a business mastermind, but we completely detox and disconnect and people have the most miraculous results in their business in the weeks to follow.

[00:26:46] It’s crazy because they’re so refreshed and so rejuvenated. And you know, for me, this. It’s more than just getting out in nature. It’s actually protecting it. So I want you to think about truly how much of an eco warrior you are. Are you showing up and voting with your dollar and making conscious choices, you know, supporting B corporations, very transparent companies with, you know, ethical supply chains or are you just buying the cheapest crap on Amazon?

[00:27:14] You know, and it’s like, These choices are going to make an impact for the future generations. And, you know, I’m very passionate about it. I have a eco business with my brother as well. He’s he runs point on it, but I support him greatly. And, you know, we’re solving the plastic pollution epidemic and we have these really creative eco centers that are upcycling plastic waste.

[00:27:32] And it’s something that I want everyone to think about. You know, when you’re thinking nature, connection, how are you actually showing up for the planet? So rank yourself. 

[00:27:43] Zach White: I love that. And Carrie, thanks for sharing your passion around just a sustainable way of living through the choices that you make day by day.

[00:27:53] Not just believing in that as a good thing. Yeah. But acting on that. A great challenge. Great reminder. All right. I got my scores, man. You want to hear this? Okay. Mindful spirituality for me. I’m a, I’m a Christian and I love the Lord, but that’s a four for, because I do see areas where I haven’t been intentional.

[00:28:11] I haven’t been focused abundance financially. The, a, there it’s a five for me. Right. I’m really. Honestly, I don’t, I don’t feel any lack and I feel progress. I think that’s for me, why it’s a five is I feel that sense of growth as the business grows. And as my wife and I invest smartly and take care of our financial house, personal developments of four as a coach, I don’t know that we’ll ever be less than a four.

[00:28:33] I was tempted to give myself a five, but I’ve been focused on execution a lot lately. So it’s a four passionate hobbies. I’m a two, I’m giving myself a team. It might be a D minus carrier. And I think that question I asked, might’ve been for myself around, what does that look like? And just doing a lot of work right now.

[00:28:51] And I love it, but there’s a big space. And if my wife hears this, she’s going to say yes and amen. More horseback time, more, more dancing, time needed. And. Yup. Impactful work, a solid five. I could not feel better about the intention and the purpose of what we do at a Waco. And it feeds my soul. It’s this right in the place of purpose for me, nature, connection and, and preservation and protection.

[00:29:18] Uh, three, I do love to get outside. You know, the horse keeps us at the barn and outside it it’s part of my life, but it’s not. It’s not as driven towards purpose and intention as you described. And, and frankly, the indoors comment, it’s still a lot more than I would like. It’s fun. So the good news carriers have taken action on that already in Q1.

[00:29:41] We’re going to spend some time in the Dominican Republic. Soon. We’re going to go out to Colorado and spend two weeks at go do some skiing and snowboarding, you know, so we’re going to, we’re going to get unplugged. Get that one back in alignment, but there you go. Great, great lists. Soul mapping. So what do I do with, I assume I add up the scores.

[00:29:59] Cary Jack: Yeah. So yeah, so there’s a couple more pieces of this puzzle. So all the, you know, engineers out there, I want you to add up your scores and if you’re 37 or above, well, congratulations. You’re happy hustling. If you’re a 36 or below. Unfortunately, you got some work to do. Okay. And here’s the thing about this exercise, this quantification, this assessment.

[00:30:27] I do this every Sunday. I actually ranked myself in each of these 10 alignments. Every Sunday, this isn’t a one and done type thing balance. Isn’t a finite destination. It’s a never ending journey. Right. And it requires those constant tweaks and pivots and adjustments. So. That’s why I have the happy hustler online assessment.

[00:30:46] It’s free. You can just save it as a bookmark and you just take it every Sunday. And I also have this whiteboard fridge magnet that goes on my fridge and I can actually quantify my balance every single day. So. Each one of those 10 alignments comes with an action task and, you know, for instance, selfless service, did I give 15 minutes of my time to someone in need today?

[00:31:06] You know, optimize health. Did I drink a gallon of water and exercise for 30 minutes? You know? And so it’s like it’s binary every single day I put an X, did I do it for Monday or not? And then at the end of the week, I can see where I, where I ranked in each of these, you know, 10 alignments that way you’re not, you know, Just like thinking of this stuff, oh, I’m a two and, you know, unplugged digitally or, you know, in passionate hobbies one time, and then, you know, you don’t have any action steps forward.

[00:31:29] So I very important key principle to happy house. And I want to share it right now with your, with your audience. You must focus on each of these alignments one at a time. But with equal importance for each alignment. Okay. So you must focus on one of these alignments additive. But give equal importance to each and see here’s the thing, man.

[00:31:55] A lot of people when they’re with their family, they’re thinking about work. And when they’re at work, they’re thinking about their families. So they’re not doing either effectively. Yes. You know, and the separation, the compartmentalization of these alignments will allow you to thrive and really happy hustle a life you love.

[00:32:12] Zach White: There’s a metaphor I share with my clients that two airplanes at half three. Both crash at the end of the runway, neither one takes off. And it’s the same here with our mind, time and energy focused. I love this equal importance, but one at a time. Yeah. If someone’s really struggles with what you just described, I’m at work wishing I was taking care of something at home or I’m with my kids thinking about work.

[00:32:40] What’s the. Easiest way to help someone learn how to take these one at a time to be fully present and focused. What would you coach someone to, to practice just their time-blocking 

[00:32:52] Cary Jack: time-blocking you must rid yourself of the distractions for the allotted task and then go all in on that test. When I’m fly fishing.

[00:33:03] I’m not thinking about. My emails, you know, I’m all in fly fishing, right? It’s like when I’m, you know, giving back to others, I’m all there. You know, it’s like, you have to just have these blocks of time where you’re distraction free and you’re, you gotta have discipline to men. It’s just comes down to discipline.

[00:33:21] Like, as jockowillink says, discipline equals freedom. 

[00:33:24] Zach White: Discipline equals freedom. I I’ve experienced this over and over carry, whether it’s with work or with, you know, my wife or anywhere, you know, I’ll use my wife as an example. She would rather have one hour of my undivided full focus, all in childlike.

[00:33:38] Wonder let’s enjoy this then a whole night of me. Halfway there are less because I’m stressed and worried about work. So I think if someone would just take that piece to heart, what will it take for me to create the time block and the discipline to just go all in, even if it’s a shorter time block, you’re going to get more value and feel better at the end of that.

[00:34:03] This idea of constant assessment, your engineers are very metric driven, and I think that’s a perfect fit for someone to say, here’s a place for me to start looking and measuring. And I want to share with you one of my dilemmas and see if you can, you’ll coach me on this. And it’s the idea of overthinking the score.

[00:34:22] Yeah. Even why as you were going through it, I was like, oh, am I at two? Where am I at 3:00 AM? I have four of my five. We get kind of caught in the, well, where am I. Versus just trusting that instinct being decisive and putting it down. If somebody is caught in the overthinking about this soul map and, you know, what would you encourage them in terms of how to use this and create real value versus it becoming some sort of cage that they’re stuck in?

[00:34:51] Cary Jack: Yeah. I actually have the rubric in my book, you know, the happiness of book, like more in depth. So you can see what a, actually a three means, you know what a two means, what a four means and, you know, five and one as well. However, I would just say, you got to be honest with yourself. Your first initial thought was probably the right thought and the right score for you, you know?

[00:35:15] And then when you start to question it. Well, you’re probably just trying to, um, give yourself some false assurance. So just trust 

[00:35:24] Zach White: your gut on that. Yeah. Yeah. I’d encourage every engineering leader listening. Just go through and do it. Go quick. Score yourself. Do it right now. Like Carrie said, and then the piece, I don’t want anyone to miss you.

[00:35:36] You described how there’s an action related to each area. Can you just give us a little snippet? How did you decide. What to do if an area was a low score. 

[00:35:49] Cary Jack: Yeah. So it will be unique for each person and inside the book, you know, I actually have like an, a sample of what I call the blissful balancer, whiteboard, fridge, magnet, like filled out in its entirety for people to reference.

[00:36:03] But for. You know, your audience and your listeners specifically, it, it will vary, you know, what does, what does loving relationships mean for you? Maybe it means, you know, just sending one gratitude, text to your lover every single day, you know, what does mindful spirituality mean? Maybe just, you know, praying.

[00:36:19] 15 minutes or meditating, you know, or doing breath work, right? Like it’s different for each person based on their practices. I would urge you to really have some deep introspection when you’re figuring out what are those action tasks for each alignment. And if you do go through the book, you’ll see, you know, there are examples and you can reference them and you can even leverage them.

[00:36:40] However, I do believe the customization component will allow 

[00:36:44] Zach White: it to stick. Okay. I’m super encouraged by this carrier and really goes all the way back to your comment about how culture has idolized and glorified hustling in a negative way. You know, I’ve given up my whole weekend towards my vocation and my family’s crumbling, but Hey, I’m working hard and reframing that.

[00:37:07] A sense of empowerment that I can hustle in all of these areas of my alignment, that when I’m playing, I hustle at play and when I’m working, I hustled work and this is, this is tremendous. So if someone wants to buy your book, get to know Carrie, really go deeper on what it means to be, you know, a happy hustle and engineer, where can they go?

[00:37:28] Yeah. 

[00:37:29] Cary Jack: Um, just the happy hustle book.com actually, we’re, we’re doing a promo for the first thousand copies where we’re actually just giving it away for free. That’s how bad I want this book read and I want to spread this message and you know, all you have to do is just help out with shipping and handling and it goes right to your doorstep.

[00:37:44] an option. If you want to get the audio book version, which I’m almost finished recording, there’ll be sent ASAP by the time this probably launches, it will be out. Um, and you know, you can get an extra copy and then there’s also, um, a course that parlays with the book. And if you wanted to get the whiteboard fridge, magnet, it’s all there.

[00:38:01] The happiest of book.com, it just kind of takes you through a sequence. Um, and then, you know, if someone feels, you know, Excited to explore further. I have, uh, the happy hustle club as you know, my membership community. And then, you know, the Montana mastermind, epic, camping adventure for the right people. Um, you know, it’s, uh, it’s a very select group, but if you’re, if you want to apply for that, you know, it’s all there that happy also booked.

[00:38:24] Zach White: I cannot recommend Kerry and his work highly enough for everyone listening. I know this guy from a couple of different trainings and some one-on-ones that just every time I’m with Gary, I come away with value and encourage. So please check that out. All the links will be in the show notes. Carrie, I want to wrap with our same place.

[00:38:42] I always end am super excited to hear your perspective on this great engineering and great coaching and the work you. Has in common, the questions lead and the answers follow. And for that engineering leader, who’s been listening to this seeking alignment, seeking blissful balance. What would be the best question that you would lead them with today?

[00:39:08] Cary Jack: What does success actually look like for you? What does success actually look like for you? Because we get caught up in other people’s definition of success. So determine what success is actually for you, and then reverse engineer that process to achieve it. 

[00:39:30] Zach White: Beautiful, Carrie, thanks so much for the time being with us today.

[00:39:34] This has been tremendous. Thanks, 

[00:39:36] Cary Jack: Zach. Peace and love everyone.